Wasn't meant to be touched... The bitterness placed its hands upon it..
And this place we left behind contains a recollection of the deep explorations and admirations,
Never once I would of thought I'd have...
I still feel the heat of the burning candle between you and I..
Do you still feel it? That heat.. I call sweet sorrow..
The burning flame..
I truly wish to never be blown away,
A soothing touch will put away the misery..
Sorrow may be eternal,
Especially if true feelings aren't exposed...
If I, Should I?
If I climb starways to heaven, will I miss out the stars?
If I just lay right here, who's to stop the cars?
If I meet with your skin, who will see my scars?
Is this really my cage, when I can see no bars?
Should I take the first step, or should I sit and wait?
Should I turn towards, or quicken up my gait?
Should I question why, or accept it as my fate?
Is the time now right, or is it far too late?
Old Fashion, still
You broke your watch and you went still,
and the sidewalks weren't very gentle.
Stepped a little over ten pills
think that you might be going mental.
'Cause you think you are running away now
thinking you got away now
from those memories, in all of those nights
That's when things were all electric,
remembering why you weren't dead
And that's when it all whirled apart.
Never really ever had much,
Always wrote down in pencil,
But never ever erased still
'Cause you always had things memorized
from the day you were dreaming of it all
From last fall to the next winter,
Never really had anyone to call
Remember when things were read 'til?
Always thought you had some common nice class
when times were all getting feverish so fast
you thought they were all sentimental
but as the murks of all men steels,
Never notice how florescent they really were
Always thinking you never needed a cure.
But you never really bit, no,
Perhaps things would deal well
In your dreams, several of them remained
Never had you in featured at all
And did you know? Oh no.
Could you ever walk without heels?
Always grasping to the curb's vines
falling besides the Grey's mind
maybe you should not have used a pencil,
knowing that it could be fatal.
Lots in common with your night dress
always kept on top of paper watches
left alone with little tuxedos
Tearing up as some gentlemen left you.
Holding up this trivial crisis as you had long ago.
In your dreams, how many of those He-Man
ever held you in their free hands?
And didn't you wish, you could be one.
One of those, those who never let go.
The Death of Hope
I wish I never met you
I wish I never kissed you
And told you that I missed you.
I wish I didn’t write stupid poems
To try and convince you to be with me
I wish I wouldn’t stop by your house just because I could.
What are we doing here
You fuck with boys’ minds
But why do you keep me around?
I wanted you
Now, I can’t even be in the same room with you
Don’t talk to me
Don’t visit me
Leave my heart
Leave my soul
And everything about me as a whole.
Get me another drink
So I can wash your memory out of my veins
Kill some cells to leave this hell
It’s the only thing that helps.
I wish every star would explode and make me go deaf
And I wish the moon’s light would soon fade to black
So that I cannot see or hear
Maybe then I’ll forget the sound of your heartbeat under the night sky.
I wish I wasn’t so stupid
To stick around while you cried over some asshole who didn’t want you
I wish I didn’t care so fucking much about your problems.
I wish I never told you how much I loved you
And all those times I spent comforting you...
Were just never quite enough.
This was never supposed to be
Just stop caring and leave.
We go in circles anyway
Progress is an illusion for what resembles hope
I wish I could hurt you.
You never loved me…
Only my presence to help you forget your pain
Used me up, and now I have no pity left for you.
If you loved me, then you should have caught me when I fell for you
…For a whole year
Now my love for you is lying dead at the bottom of a dark trench.
I wish we never took so many pictures
Ones that I never should have taken
What were we thinking?
It took the death of hope to let you go
And now I finally know…
Stay cold and alone in your bed
Without the warmth of the blue jacket
Or the sweet aroma of my cologne
I hope you hurt just as much as I do
I hope your guilt eats you alive
And you grasp what was lost
I hope when your eyes visit the moon
You realize the distance back to your heart
And remember how far I loved you.
I wish I could forget you
And everything we ever had
Don’t you get it?
I don’t care about you.
I don’t care about your needs.
I don’t care about your feelings.
But I do.
Maybe one day our hearts will bring us back home
Right here to the place where we’d meet
Where hope and dreams walk hand in hand
Where reality meets actuality
Where love is the only thing that matters.
And where the death of hope becomes the birth of new possibilities.
Tears Behind My Eyes
When you look into my eyes they may seem to be empty,
My eyes are full of tears, although you don't see any.
So many times my heart has been filled with pain,
And deep behind my eyes are pockets of tears that are ready to fall like rain.
I know at times I may appear to be tough,
but sometimes to bear the pain and heartache can be too much.
Sometimes I try and hide the tears that I cried just last night,
Tears that soaked my pillow wet long past mornings first light.
I know how it feels to be pushed away by someone you love,
I'm not afraid to admit my tears because I know that there's a far greater love, one that comes from above.
Happiness too will be mine, so until then I'll keep my my head up and eyes towards the skies,
And never allowing anyone to see the tears hidden behind my eyes.
Plagued by heart break
Lost in memories of the light
These days are so dark
Black, I live only to fight,
Against Haunting thoughts
Where I die every time.
They say that your dreams outline what you want.
So, I want to suffer
To die alone and afraid.
It's true after what happened between us
I don't feel I deserve to live
But, I was never one to have the last say
That was your job
To make sure every thing was right
every thing was perfect
As perfect as you were
But now that my half doesn't match your's
Where does that leave me
Who is going to want some one that is perfect for you.
I know, it hurts
the storm has come and gone
leaving you and I
broken in ruins but this cant be where i die
I needed someone that protected me from my self
and you never could
and so i move on from this place
with a heavy heart all alone
The memories held me down for so long
because i couldn't just let go of you
and it still hurts
but i know now what i must do to survive this place
There is nothing left
and i desperately rebuild my life
from the broken pieces
you left of my heart on the floor
Time is no friend as he burns the wound shut
and the tears they flow like blood from a cut
But i need to be strong with one foot after another
i just have to move on
Because you’ve left me to rot all alone.
I Can't Stop Crying Today
I can't stop crying today
My world walked out the door
With her she took my heart
For I will love no more
The hours passed like seconds
When our two hearts were one
The seconds passed like hours
After she said that she was done
She was going to love me forever
At least that is what she said
Her heart belonged to someone else
That is what her letter read
I no longer live in color
My world is black and white
I always wonder what she is doing
As I lie awake at night
I hope tomorrow is better
This is what I pray
But right now my heart is broken
I can't stop crying today
The Unsent Poem
Favorite song plays in the background
Every lyric reminding me of you
Conversations running through my head
So many things that I wish you knew
Everytime that you brought me happiness
I just never quite knew what to say
I was afraid to say the wrong thing
Thinking it would make you go away
Every night I did the same old thing
I wrote poem after poem on my bed
I love you written a hundred ways
Because of fear, they were never said
The stack of poems stands tall
Not one ever making it to you
You simply walked away from me
And a love that you never knew
If only I would have taken a chance
I know that you would still be here
At night I still write you many poems
Only now the ink is mixed with tears
Crying In A Corner.
Sitting here starring at a wall,
Waiting for the day that you call,
I want to talk to you,
Let alone be with you,
Sitting here in a corner can't you see,
All these tears aren't good for me
I would give up everything,
All of my dreams and my friends,
I would just enjoy being around you,
Not just for love,
I may love you,
And I know it isn't in return,
Now I'm crying here,
My heart starts to burn.
Roaring in flames,
Holes and knots in my heart,
Talking about broken hearts are menial,
For mine is a ball of strings.
Cripple my heart,
Stop me from feeling,
Completely break me.
I was told to be happy,
I cannot with myself,
My heart is turning to stone,
The marrow in my bones settle,
All of it is going down through the phone,
What the fuck is up with this world,
My world of death,
All my friends and loved in a room,
They start to fall one by one,
What has my life become?
Holding a guitar tempted to strum,
To the beat my heart refuses to give,
But to turn the rest of me.
My heart and feelings no longer function,
It's all just one conjunction of lies and threats.
I want you and no-one else,
This is when I cling to myself,
But I have nothing to cling to...
Are you crying?"
my heroic fool.
You selfishly took my bullet.
You were my lover and my friend,
If you only knew,
My whole world was you.
with every touch,
my heart raced,
I only wish i could have taken your place.
You loved me,
from the very start.
If only I'd known sooner,
our love could have lasted longer.
Our love was not meant to be,
so we were torn apart
with that shiny bullet,
through your heart.
What wrong did we do in this world,
other than to dare be different.
Our hearts beat like everyone elses,
so why do people think that they couldn't love and feel pain.
We're all the same,
though in our looks we range.
A Funeral Of The Hearts
There's no end in sight
to this everlasting blight.
Mountains of ash,
freshly scorched dreams.
sinks to dismal.
All doors close,
yet none seem to open.
Sit and wait,
pleasant pictures of the past.
Things seemed so eternal,
magic frozen in time.
Mind looks toward the future
Hollow, in desolate sorrow,
grim future in sight.
A funeral of the hearts
My Love for you will never die
I`m thinking about what you said
And it makes me wish that I were dead
You only loved me when you were mine
But I`ll love you till the end of time
If you fall for someone else
It will make my life a living hell
My love for you will never die
Even if you aren't mine
And when you fall for me again
I`ll be hanging from a rope loving you while I`m dead.
Cast my thoughts across the land
Watch me ebb slowly from the sand
Wring me dry, hang me up
Isn't my love big enough?
Sleep with tears upon your cheeks
Brush me from the torrid weeks
That I left you, all alone
Bar me from your empty home
Fling a fishing net off-shore
Pull me in, shut the door
Satisfy your salty hands
Wrap me up in iron bands
Paint pictures of a scarlet love
Watch the world from high above
Spinning in your holy spire
Leave me in my dirty mire
Leonard Cohen had it right:
Love is a grey fading light
Even with all my hateful might
I'll never escape your bright night
...Remember My Words...
You choose him,
time after time.
I'll write yet another,
poem about why I'm sad.
I'm so sick of it all,
I miss feeling glad.
I'm tired of writing,
these poems that never put me at ease.
If someone knows the way out of this heartache,
Don't hesistate to tell me, please.
People say "You'll be okay",
And smile right at you.
And your thinking," Yeah right,
you don't know what I'm going through".
Do you know what it's like to feel,
like you'll never feel happy?
Or what it's like to feel like you have to scratch your eyes out,
Just so you couldn't see?.
Even as I write these words,
my breath is filled with sighs.
Because they remind me of you,
so I slowly begin to cry.
It's not fair,
this feeling that's left me bare.
It's not fair that I'm still missing you,
and you don't even care.
You made that obvious,
when you let my world turn dark.
I stare lifelessy at everyone,
On my heart, you left a mark.
My poem is done,
my feelings have been told.
I hope you remember my words,
Til' the day you are grey and old..."